Fish.

That is all.

Page ninety-nine!

So I decided to do this blogfest. It's where you post the ninety-ninth page of your novel. And I signed up, thinking that I would have SOMETHING.

Turns out, exactly halfway through page ninety-nine is where my novel starts to deteriorate and become just a random spew of my brain that involves the characters getting into a ghetto fight and talking about feminism among other things. It was really late and the last few days of NaNo. I can't really make an excuse other than that.

Even though people will be all 'WHAT NOW.' when they read it, I feel like it gives insight to kinda what kinda sorta goes on inside my brain. :D

Without further ado...

"No," he shuddered. "She seemed a bit crazy and...clingy. I didn't want to have her near me."

"Well, she's showing how crazy she can be." Nesca smiled at the both of them.

"A fan club, though?" Chemile raised his eyebrows. "I know you're amazing and all, but do you really need a fan club?"

"I guess he does." Nesca patted Quintille's head. "And I'm going to be the first person besides her to join it. Just to piss you off."

"You wouldn't dare."

"I'll lead them right to your door and everything. You know... unless you decide to make me a mayor."

"I told you I would think about it."

"I bet she's wondering where you live. I'll just head on home and send her a message to tell her your room number."

"OH HELL NAWWWWWWWWW." Quintille took off his earrings and handed them to Chemile. "Hold my earrings for me. This is going to get messy."

They then started circling each other like sumos and Quintille body slammed Nesca to the ground.

Chemile clapped like the good little first lady he was and then gave Quintille his earrings back. He suddenly poofed into an evening gown and struck a pose. "Quintille and Chemile one, Nesca ZEROOOOOOOOOO."

Nesca got up and tried to catch a fish, but started crying instead. "All those sumo lessons. For nothing."

"I was always the stronger one," Quintille said over his shoulder. "I always beat you in fights."

"I guess they were right, back in the day. Girls are weaker than guys."

"NO YOU DIDN'T." Chemile gasped. "Anti-feminist alert! Sound the alarms!" He took off his earrings and handed them to Quintille.

"Oh no, not again."

They started to circle each other. Somehow, Chemile slipped and fell on his face. Lue sat on his head.

 Can't you tell exactly where it started falling apart?

So that's that page of my novel, and I can assure you that it only gets worse after that. Chemile starts mingling like a trophy wife and they die and Quintille turns Jamaican and starts talking about starting a bobsledding team and I break the fourth wall and loin cloths and Harry Potter and Jesus and good golly I forgot about all that. 

 This was fabulous, let's do it again soon. Preferably with a page BEFORE ninety-nine. 

Alligator in French is, in fact, alligator.

Today is officially new year's eve. It's going to be sexy.

I am going to have eight billion friends over and we are going to party and eat and giggle and play freaking video games.

I have not done a book review in ages.

I have not completed a book in ages. I've reread several of my favorites, but I haven't finished a new one. I've started about fifteen (those include Clockwork Angel and Sapphique).

I've been busy being a stupid and playing Sims 3 and reading manga and watching anime.

Sims 3 is an amazing game. My sims, however, are stupid. Let me first set the stage.

I like making Sims of either characters from things I write (LIKE MY NOVEL YOU'LL GET TO SEE INSIDE MY NOVEL WHILE I EXPLAIN THIS) or my friends.

The first family I made in Sims was my trio of main characters plus the best friend's love interest.

Quintille (AUGH IT'S SUCH A LAME NAME WHY WOULD I EVER NAME SOMEONE THAT I NEED TO CHANGE IT.) is my main character and the character creator didn't have any good hair and he looks ugly. Also, since I got only around to figuring out/describing what my characters look like more than halfway through the novel, I ended up getting him and his love interest's hair color mixed up. Way to go, me. He ends up being THE FREAKING PRESIDENT, so I figured that the political track would be good for him. In his wishes, he keeps wanting to quit his job and woohoo with his love interest. Woohoo is amazing because that's one of the ways the game can get away with a T rating. I read that on the tropes page on it. You should try reading it, it's interesting. He adopted a baby because he's weird and he couldn't figure out how to marry his love interest. In that last sentence, replace he with I. Puts out his love interest's fires. Scolds love interest for not going to work. Encourages creeping on young children.


Chemile (AUGH IT'S SUCH A LAME NAME I NEED TO CHANGE IT WHY WOULD I EVER NAME SOMEONE THAT AUGH WHYYY.) is my main character's love interest. Stupid. Does not go to work. Makes fires and stands in them. Creeps on young children.

Lue (I really like this name, mons) is my main character's best friend. Blonde, stupid and whoreish. The most notable of her stupidness is stealing babies. You heard me right. She legitimately STEALS BABIES. Well, not babies plural. Not yet, at least. She picks up Quinny's baby, walks around the house, drops it several times, picks it back up and eventually ends up in the back yard. DROPS IT NEXT TO THE SWIMMING POOL. LEAVES IT THERE. Sometimes when I'm paying attention to another sim, I'll see that the baby's happy meter is low and I have Quinny go to its room and it's NOT THERE. And it's in the FREAKING BACKYARD.

Lumin (okay name, I could have done better) is best friend's love interest. He's probably the best out of all of them. He does things extreme and has a mohawk and he aged up and now his everyday clothes are a green tanktop and purple track pants. And he has a mohawk and he has a mohawk and looks like a freaking stupid. Other than that, he goes to work everyday and is a CIA agent even though his dream was to become a forensic person and I chose the wrong side of law enforcement or something. Whatever, he'll deal.

There are my sims and my characters in my novel and that's totally not how they are in the novel, even though I should totally make them that way because it would be funny.

But I haven't addressed the title of this lovely post yet.

Recently, whenever I talk to a friend of mine (conveniently named Erin as well) I say random words like fish and she responds in French and I say more words and I try to stump her. And I said alligator and she didn't respond and eventually told me that alligator in French is, in fact, alligator.

Just a little fact I thought y'all should know.

New year's resolutions never work out.

This year, I am going to use REVERSE psychology on myself. I will be saying the opposite of what I ACTUALLY want to do. It's sure to work.

• I will not be more fabulous. Not any more than I actually am. I have reached my capacity.
• I will not grow my hair out. Really freaking short is long enough for me!
• I'll ALWAYS go on the computer before doing my homework. The reverse is not an option. Who wants good grades?
• On school nights, I will go to bed extremely late. Three or four is good. You don't need quality sleep! The bags-under-your-eyes are in style right now.
• When my driver's test comes around, I will fail it with FLYING COLORS. Especially the parallel parking part.
• I am going to lose NaNo '11. I will write no more than two hundred words a day, if at all. I will have no plot and Mary-Sue characters. I will write like a freaking STEPHANIE MEYER.
• I am not going to make a hat. I will give up and cut it into pieces and cry. 
• It's impossible. I will never finish reading all the freaking books on my book wall. I could never finish all of them in one year.
• I won't finish putting up sticky notes on my walls and various other things from my ceiling. It would make my room far too ugly. Plus, the colors clash.
• I wouldn't imagine of blogging more than once a week. Maybe once a month is better. 
• I will die. I can't live through another whole year. Plus, the year after next is 2012 and I'll end up dying anyway. It will be much less painful to do it this way.
• I will not try out for Romeo and Juliet. And I will most definitely not get to role of Mercutio who happens to be most fabulous person in the whole world.
• I will be horrified and disappointed when The Legend of Korra comes out. It will be absolutely horrible and I will cry after every episode where I don't see Toph.
• I will not save up enough money to buy an iPad or a laptop. They're far too expensive. I can't do that. Not in a whole year.
• I will make sure that my room is covered in a layer of dirt and candy wrappers.
• I will also let down the MANY readers of my blog with lame posts. Prepare to be bored.

I think those are some pretty fine resolutions.

Now for some predictions of the year to come that are not in reverse psychology format.

• Everyone will start panicking and stocking up on canned food for 2012.
• Goliath will come out and be the best freaking thing ever.
• I will turn older.
• The second half of the seventh Harry Potter movie will be sexy, especially with Gringotts and everything. And maybe they'll cut out a few deaths because there are a few choice people who I love.
• Sarah Palin may or may not be mauled by a bear. Or maybe a moose. Either will do.
• I will continue being a stupid and keep using dumb words like squish and fish and alligator and sexy and things like that when I can't think of anything else. 
• I will win THE GAME.
• Actually I already have, but I'm sure that this year the Pope or the Prime Minister of somewhere will confirm it.YAY!

Why do YOU less than three the devil?

Let me start off first by saying that this picture is pretty much completely incorrect. In the spelling/grammar type way.

• Homo's

Homo's are quite fabulous. I love how that is the first thing on that list.

• Druggies

Druggies are not fabulous because they do drugs. DRUGS ARE THE DEVILLLL. :O

• Gangster's

I think that gangster's are pretty pimpin'. Except the whole pants thing. (I would like to note that the first time I tried to type the word 'pants', it ended up as 'plants'.)

• Feminist's

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. Also, men are okay as long as they stay in the kitchen where they belong. And if they make me a sammich.

• Mormon's

lulz, UTAH. My grandmother is a Mormon thing.

• Buddhist's

Dood. Buddhist's are really sweet. It's all 'HAHAHA. I WAS A UNICORN IN A PAST LIFE AND YOU WERE A FREAKING DUNG BEETLE. I WIN.'

• Drunkard's

Hey, some of my best friends are Drunkard's. HAHAHA JAYKAY. I think drunk people can do what they want. As well as less than three the devil.

• Bahi's

I feel really stupid, but I had to wiki this. I just read probably half of the article and I still don't know what it is.

• Catholic's

I'm guessing that the people who are displaying this sign are from WBC. Catholics are kinda... weird.

• Wifebeater's

I BEAT MY WIFE. I take that as an insult.

• Atheist's

I'm sure a bunch o' people read that and laugh. They don't believe in the devil. Haha. :D Whoever wrote that sign looooooses.

• New ager's

Y'know, I'm not even going to comment.

• Democrat's

Democrats will freaking rule the world. 'Nuff said.

• Environmentalist's?

Uh... WHAT? People who care about the Earth less than three the devil? If anyone, it's the idiots who wrote that. They're the ones who are not recycling and using giant trucks and SUVs that take up so much uckyness. They're probably the people behind the oil spills too.

• P.K.'s

Huh? I'm probably overlooking something totally obvious that I already know of, but all I'm getting when I wiki it is a type of car. Yes. A type of car less than threes the devil.

• Abortionist's

Is that even a group thingy? I've never heard that term before. Whatever.

• Effeminate men

Good golly. These people are so horrible. Effeminate men are the most fabulous thing ever. Do they not want the world to be fabulous? Curse them.

• Racist's

Clearly, these people are racists. That means that they less than three the devil. Go logic fail!

• Scientologist's

I think that sciencey people are the most fab. Don't you? I mean, they're all sciencey and smart.

• Emo's

Emo's are super cool. They're all raccoon like and they have hair that is in their faces. I don't see how they don't run into walls every other second. I guess that is a skill that emo's have and that makes them much cooler. Plus, they empty their emptiness by slitting their wrists. With cell phones. So parents, don't let your children have cell phones in case they're emo and want to empty their emptiness.

I am far too lazy to do the rest. But I want to say that I am more fabulous than everyone else. I believe that I will do a book review tomorrow. It will be on Unwind.

Also, note to everyone:
I purposely did the 's stuff to make fun of the poster thing in the picture. I did not do it on purpose, though some people think I did and felt the need to correct me.

I'm writing this in a box while eating fish water.

Apparently when everyone (meaning people who I was with today) graduates, instead of going to college, we're going to go and travel the world. They'll bring me along so I can blog about it and get them money, because apparently really popular blogs can make money and stuff. I was told that I will be shoved in a box with a laptop to blog. Let me give you the quote that I remember.

"We'll put you in a box to blog, and you'll tell everyone, 'Hey, I'm writing this from -insert random country here- and I'm in a box. It's a really nice box. It has four sides and a bottom and a top. It's made out of cardboard. And there's a hole in front of me where they spoon in fish water. And on days when I'm really lucky, I get gruel!'"

I don't really remember anything else. I think that is a good idea, though. But I do have to object to the gruel and fish water.

Today's fish is trout a la creme.

I don't remember why that popped into my head. My dad probably said it today.

I feel like there's not much to say today except for the few things following this. Expect this to be a short post.

Doctors are sadistic. I mean, they stab you with pieces of metal and make you bleed or put stuff into you. And it's painful. I'm feeling this way because today, I went to the doctor for a check-up-type-thing and they stabbed me. TWICE. I mean, if they wanted me to die, they could have slit my wrists or something. But NOOOOOOOOOOO they had to stab me. And needles in my book are the worst things to ever be created.

I think that's all I really have to say. I'm just a lazy person today, but I promise you three or four readers that I will have an ultra-fabulous long one tomorrow. :D

Oh! That reminds me, I want to know how many people read this as of now, so when you read this, please comment with just like, your name or whatever. Or some random sentence. Or what you want me to blog about next. :D I would love all of you guys forever if you did that.